In my workshops I’m very upfront that I struggle with depression and PTSD. What many people without this struggle don’t often realize is that the reasons why these challenges exist are usually far less important than how we experience them, and finding ways to manage ourselves accordingly.
As individuals the reasons vary widely, from purely biological to acute traumas or acquired maladaptive behaviors through long-term or repeated exposures. Ultimately, the root cause typically comes to vulnerabilities which, for whatever reason, we can no appropriately defend against. Sometimes this is expressed as apathy, sadness, despair, self-loathing, hostility or rage, etc.
However, as beings that share the human condition, there are often times a shared commonality in how we experience these struggles. For example, very often depression can result in an inner monologue that punishes ourselves for feeling this way – often with toxic critique. It’s rarely ever a voice that is uplifting or encouraging, but seeks to put down, trivialize, or insult and shame us.
I recently watched an episode of Bojack Horseman that did an excellent job of illustrating the voice of angry depression through self-loathing. Actually, this whole episode did a great job of exploring these various aspects of depression in its characters. Bojack Horseman is filled with examples of self-sabotage, self-loathing, depression, angst, regret, narcissism, delusional optimism, and a host of other issues. Its a great example of how different issues take form and impact peoples lives and choices in an ongoing basis.
Here’s the clip of the self-loathing inner monologue below, but I recommend the show overall…